255

09 April 2012...wrote this at a bus stop located at Tuas...

Waiting for bus, alone, at a corner, a very quite place, surrounded by giant factories, you can hardly see any car passed by. It's 8.11pm. Bus no: 255, bus stop no: 24179.

Louis sent me to Pioneer mrt station today, considered lucky already as I can take private car instead of public van. Took me 15 mins to arrive Bukit Batok by MRT. Arrived house doorstep at 7pm sharp, just realized I left my house key in the office. That is why I am here...

Many things happened recently, I tried tremendously hard to overcome all. I has yet to complete my proposal which has already due middle last week. Many unexpected things happened and expected things never happen. I am under a lot of stress, dissapointment and, sadness.

I need some strength, God. I need you to shower me with lots of wisdom, confidence, energy, cares and love...
I wish there will be no betrayers, no liars, no... you name it.

It is extremely hard to express in words... Feelings sadness...helplessness...

Path to office

Path to the nearest bus stop from office

Bus stop no: 24179

A Better Tomorrow

Attended with sis at her friend's wedding dinner last night, sat beside an English teacher. We spent most of the time chatting with the teacher instead of enjoying the food. We talked basically everything, from career to marriage life, from very down moment in life to very successful in everything. I do not know the best way to express myself in words over here, what I can share is I see things differently from now. I used to be very inferior, lack of self-confidence, and tend to be materialistic...just very negative.

I laid on the bed, closed my eyes and try to recall what I have done in my past few weeks, months and years. Suprisingly I only recall vivid memories, not suprisingly there were also few sad state of affairs. This positive force has drived me to look for a better tomorrow.

Think of what you desperately wish in your life, ask for it and eventually you will receive. May the joy be with you forever.

I do believe there are things 'forever', forever till your last breath.

God bless you forever.

We reap what we sow

Its 31st August, after midnight, it will be one year already. I was here for 1 year already. How time passed...-listening to Lullabye by Yiruma-

I feel extremely down today. You didnt reach me when I need it. What are the sign hinted to me all these while? I am confused, I am upset, and I am a lil lost. Anyway, still want to thank you for all these while.

Well, been hearing about his name while I was in my third year. Remembered it was told by my mathematics lecturer, he managed to gain admission to pursue Masters in Imperial College. They want me to go over once I finished my degree program. Told me that you attended a seminar few years ago and I was there too. How coincidence, and finally I met him this evening after work. We chat for awhile, hey, I know i am not so intelligent, but your words has unconsciously hurting me ok! Anyway, many thanks for your help and the payment, you are the only last person who I can approach. It is totally a released as the due date is 2nd Sep and I am going back hometown tomorrow. Reaching out to someone who is indeed of your help is really something, and that person will never forget you, ever. I know it was a small favor but really meant alot to me. - Thank you CG -

I was delighted when your email came in couple minutes ago, but I am still down.

****** Happy 1 year anniversary to me in Singapore ******

Stars

Have you look at the sky tonight already? I've been staying in Singapore for almost 9 months already and tonight is the first night I saw stars shinning very bright in the sky, as if something extremely big and good is going to happen! Awesome!

I feel very happy today, even though I came back late from office, bout 10pm due to some urgent work to submit and the usual meeting. Somehow, I felt that I have been doing the right things and commits good vows to God and keep it as promised. The best part is when the loved ones agreed and support whatever i am doing.

Went to one of the oldest temple today after meeting, I felt so de stress and that kind of happiness is real hard to express, I kneed down and starts to pray, eventhough we are rushing back to office, but the little time spent for prayers really worth a million things. Had dinner in NTU, I felt the peacefulness and gratitude with the surrounding conditions in the university especially when it was surrounded by people, students, lecturer and even the cleaner. Thank God for creating such an excellent human brain to take care of just about everything and every living thing.

Stars still shinning, something good is ahead of us, may the joy be always with you:-)

Thank God. Om Mani Padme Hum

Ask, BELIEVE, and Receive

A Secret Scrolls message from Rhonda Byrne
Creator of The Secret and The Power



Ask, Believe, Receive - just three simple steps to create what you want. However, very often the second step, believe, can be the most difficult one. And yet it is the greatest step you will ever take. When you master believing, you have mastered your life.

To master believing, all you have to do is tip the balance of your thoughts, words, and actions, from 'not believing' to believing. The ONLY thing that can ever get in the way of manifesting what you want, is having more thoughts of 'not believing', speaking more words of 'not believing', and taking more actions of 'not believing', than you are of believing. Base the majority of your thoughts, words, and actions in believing, and the law of attraction must obey you.

Believing contains no doubt. Believing does not waiver. Believing is absolute faith. Believing remains steadfast despite what is happening in the outside world.

Focus Intensely on NOW

Stress, worry, and anxiety simply come from projecting your thoughts into the future and imagining something bad. This is focusing on what you don't want! If you find that your mind is projecting into the future in a negative way, focus intensely on NOW. Keep bringing yourself back to the present.

Use all of your will, and focus your mind in this very moment, because in this moment of now there is utter peace.

Love=Marriage

I truly believe that Love, is when two person like each other and care for each other very much. A true marriage life is when two person love each other and they are ready to commit themselves to form a family which will be happiness forever. I'm not sure if one married for the sake of forming a family, to have kids and eventually live together and slowly develope the love for each other could last long...it is very sad isnt it? I read an article about a man married a lady was to have a family without the love for her, but to have kids. I don't quite believe it, how could you married someone without loving her? Marriage is simple because LOVE, CONCERN, you want to CARE for her/him, you feel good when he/she is around...etc. MARRIAGE=LOVE. one will never married the person he/she doesn't like.

It is LIFE

When a big change occurs in your life it forces you to change direction. Sometimes the new path may not be easy, but you can be absolutely certain that there is magnificence for you on the new path. You can be absolutely certain that the new path contains things that you could not have experienced otherwise.

When we look back at a negative event that occurred in the past, we often see how in fact it transformed our life. We see how that event directed us toward a life that we would not change for anything.

Life can be as beautiful as you thought of

Thing changed...to a better one than before...I was blessed by God and people around me...Thank you very much. I felt love, care and concern....it is very touching. So for as long as you have a positive thought in your mind, things you wish could be a reality one day.... You are what you think...

Sad

It is very very sadden when everything just gone wrong...

What am I supposed to do...

What will be our future like? What am I doing right now? Am I wasting my time? Am I doing the right thing? What am I supposed to do?

I have to decide, decide on where to go…

I cant waste my time just like this…

The feeling is very confused...

I need to find a way out…

I have to go…really gotta go…

Currently listening to...

~I want to Know What Love is-Foreigner~

Happy Chap Goh Mei-Happy Chinese V-day

I know I have to settle something very important, something to do with my future, something very urgent....but somehow I came over and here I am to share with you some recent thoughts that have in my mind that had accumulated for quite sometime already....(under extremely sleepy condition)

Gotta submit some urgent design work on tomorrow morning...somehow, I don't really feel the stress anymore, for as long as the confidence is there... I have very good feeling in my workplace recently...I feel there are more works coming and we can grow!as in bigger and stronger...and especially the relationship between the colleague grow better and more lovely...ouh, please forget about those annoying people...its their nature that we can no longer give'em advices..

Not sure if it was due to the weather or working in a fully air conditional room, I have suffered from chapped craked peeling lips. It comes on and off, and sometimes it was painful and feel very uncomfortable. Haven't got a time to buy an onitment yet...been very busy these day. Do you know that working in Singapore can be quite fun sometimes? I like the night lighting especially after meeting at night...walking in the night...feels the cold breeze...some area can be very lovely and beautiful! yes...of course, provided that someone is able to bring us there;) I still love the night I spent at Sentosa watching the Songs of the Sea...though the session was very short, but I really enjoyed it and will treasure the moment in my mind forever. Its Chap Goh Mei today, and what people used to call the Chinese Valentine's Day...Well, how you spent the last day of Chinese New Year 2011? Burning some gold paper for the God and do some praying? Dating at a high class restaurant? Working very hard until forgotten your dinner?...I spent my good day in workplace, and had a late meeting at a Japanese company with my colleague, and had a very warm good simple dinner at Crystal Jade La Mian XLP, its near to Lucky Plaza. I am feeling goooooood:) so do you?

Ouh yes...talk about my GM!You!yes...you! you are marvellous...you can know everything and you just so expert in everything...kind, soft-hearted, caring, patience, top, low profile...how can I be like you?! I have meet alot of different kind of people in my life...some are bad, tricky, thrifty, but some are very good, thoughtful, admiring...you are extremely uniquely gooood! will learn from you the best I can...really pray and wish there are more people like you! he care very much for the staff, and jokes with us, treated us in every single meal, cuts fruit in the office! get along pretty well with us and count my blessing, am very close with him...and so I learn really alot from him...from engineering to psychology, from food to live optimistically...just about everynthing....God bless :) Its really a blessing to have meet this kind of people...almost extinct species!

I do (Cherish you)--am listening to this song...very peaceful...feeling upmost gratitude...thank you the blessing from my parents, my sister...thank you and for those who come into my life...Thank God for answering my prayers...

I hereby wish everyone...Have a Good GOOOD year ahead and do not turn yourself down when you encounter some problem...always pray and believe in God. He does exists...

+~The harder you work, the luckier you become~+

Random Sweet Dreams

I had one last night...a very sweet one but somehow annoying...

This guy hold my hand and we were at the escalator...I tried to let go...but he hold my hand very tightly and refused to let go...said:aiya...our colleague will see la...lolx...deng...he has a very smooth hand..right...its just a dream :)

Went for a meeting last night...and dragged until very late...we almost secure the job!Hopefully yea...went for Pizza after that with my gm...what an exhausted night but good good night.

Veggie Lover

Lunch at a vegetarian restaurant near Jurong Bird Park with GM CH and M Jimmy

Working with Anger

Do you believe in karma?

Yes, I definitely believe in it.

First, let's look at what we did in this life to encounter others who treat us poorly. How did we get into this situation? What did we do that aggravated the other person and made him act this way towards us? We must be very honest with ourselves. Maybe we really weren't so innocent. Maybe we were trying to manipulate the other person and he didn't fall for it. He got upset and so we play hurt and offended. But in fact, our own behaviour brought the situation about.

By being introspective, we'll notice our faults and can correct them. The we won't find ourselves in such unpleasant situations in the future.

This means we take responsibility for being in that situation, regardless of whether or not the other person is making an indue fuss. By acknowledging our mistakes or wrong motivations, we'll become aware of how our behaviour affects other people. By avoiding destructive behaviour in the future, we won't activate others to harm us.

That's looking at what we did in this lifetime to trigger the event. Let's now look from a broader viewpoint, over the course of many lifetimes. This brings in the topic of karma, which is the intentional actions. Our actions leave imprints on our consciousness. These imprints later ripen and influence our experiences.

What we experiences now is a result of what we have done in previous lifetimes...I can tell that not many of you who are reading this believe in this isn't it? Let's say someone is beating is, this signifies that in previous lives we have harmed others. To experience that effect now, we must have done something previously. Karma- action and its result is like a boomerang. We throw it out and it comes back to us. Similarly, if we treat others in a certain way, we put that energy into the universe- and it comes back to us later.

Understanding this allows us to accept responsibility for the situation.

May the joy always be with you

Imagine writing an email of what you want to the Universe. When you are happy that your email is very clear, you hit "Send" and you know your request has gone into the ethers. You also know that the Server of the Universe is an automatic system, and it doesn't question email requests. Its job is simply to fulfil every request.
If you begin to worry and stress that you haven't got what you wanted, then you have just sent another email to the Universe to stop your order. And then you wonder why you haven't received what you asked for.
Once you Ask, know that the Server of the Universe is an automatic infallible system that never fails, and expect to receive your request!

May the joy be with you

Every day, or at the very least once or twice a week, take a few minutes and focus on seeing yourself in joy. Feel yourself in joy. Imagine only joy ahead in your life and see yourself basking in it. As you do this the Universe will move all people, circumstances, and events to bring you that joy. You can't be in joy if you have money worries, or health worries, or relationship problems with friends or family. So deposit some joy in the bank of the Universe as often as you can. There isn't an investment that is more worthwhile.

Rhonda Byrne

A time for myself

Went for few meeting with three of my bosses this afternoon, met up with the company CEO and some other engineers and project manager. We had a grand lunch at Lagun Club, the dinning hall is just right besides the huge lake, very beautiful golf coast scence. It is tough for a newbie like me to mingle in with their strange conversation topic, current issues...etc. I think what a fresh graduate must do the moment they step into working world is to make sure be alert and study people's personality, foresee something that is going to happen, have sometime for yourself to do meditation. With these, we can actually remember every event we carried out everyday very well, especially whatever we said, think, learn and hear-improve your memory.

To survive in a fiercely competitve job market, one need to be extremely alert and have a very good memory. With these two, I personally think one would have no issue in getting a position with good pay.

Listening to my favourite music...while making my personal daily diary...feel very peaceful and filled with gratitude...am gonna attend a course this few days, very glad that company is so generous to pay such a huge sum of money in investing their people...

Its incredible...

-Unforgettable-Frank Sinatra-

-I Love You For Sentimental Reasons-Nat King Cole-

Thank You once again-My Graduation

I feel so proud for my family, my dad, my mum and my only sister. They've brought me to who I am now...I am proud of my university, I must thank you my lecturers, my professors, my faculty dean...and lastly, thank you my friends. Without each and everyone of you, there will be no Sin Mei. I am so touch when mom secretly put the red packet under my phone, sis sacrified her annual leave for me, and dad book the hotel 1 month earlier before my graduation. So so Thankful.

It was a very tiring day on the 9,10 and 11 Oct 2010, but at the same time will be the most important and meaningful day I will never forget in my life. It's my degree graduation!

Waking up at 4.30am for the entire 3 days was really exhausting. Landmark hotel doesn't provide very good services, I'll say you better book Catherina hotel instead! 9 Oct 10, Vice Chancellor Award Ceremony. It was held at the Examination Hall, F2, it was a shame not to meet those who suppose to attend, they prefer to work (the reason is that they work half day on Sat and get a full day pay!) and that they do not have to apply unpaid leave, so they were absence. Anyway, mum and dad are really proud cause they managed to sit with both the Deputy Vice Chancellor! It was so great to see my name appeared on the list and its written "VIP 1" table :D which mean there will be people serving food for us instead of taking it all yourself (its buffet). The food were so excellent-nasi briyani! - one of my fav's.

10-10-10 Sunday

This is the first day of convocatio, only for PhD graduates, Masters, DPLI and Special award graduates. I was awarded Chancellor Award and recieving it from our Sultan Johor. All the graduates have to register themselve, prepare and wait at the Lecture Hall 2 (DK2). It is because Sultan Johor was giving out the award, we were all told to say "Menjunjung Kasih Tuanku" and makesure we 'Keksi", both are a must! Later then we queue and move to the DTII Hall. When the time come, my name was mentioned very loud and clear and it is the first name called out-I was panic! I do not know why and how, I never do both the MUST to do that we were all told. All the graduates did that except me! gosh...when I heard my name, my mind go blank, totally...haha it was so bad isn't it?

Thanks Wan Mei for attending it on our first day!:D

Then the next day...

11-10-10

I told myself I must remember to do it this time and it was our Pro Chancellor this time. Luckily I did all I suppose to :) Few sms wishes was sent to my mobile, one is from a very strict, very fierce, very responsible lecturer, Mr Adanan, and the other one I could remember was from my boss. Later then some lecturer called up and also friends who never forget me;) Thanks yea!

Thank you Suan, your the very first friend I met when I come out from the hall (its really crowded)

The afternoon...

Dato has been sooo kind to organised a Homecoming Program at RECESS to welcome us and our family members for a grand lunch I'll say. The food-Thumbs up! Thank you Dr Lee for calling and joined us for the meal.

Left: Ah Jie, me, Mom, Dato' Ismail, Prof. DC, Assoc. Prof. Lee, and dad.

Kent and I-Thanks for coming buddy!

Best IAI London partner! with AMI.

UTHM Civil Engineering Graduates

Prof DC, me and Dato Ismail at Recess

Why still single?

When people asked me why are you still single? and my answer will somehow be as simple as i want to be single and freedom...but when I think deeply, actually mature one are hard to find ;)

How to you find your works are interesting?

It is very rare for people to like working, some, or perhaps most work for the sake of money....well, I am one of them of course:P but think of the other way, when you like something in the office, eventually you'll like to go to work, cause you're looking forward to see it, or maybe him/her, your colleagues or even your bosses. Some might have love their work just because they like the work itself (very very extremely rare)....Hmm...I'm getting used to my working environment already, my females' colleagues are all very nice and good to me, not the guy. So in my department, there are only 3 gals including me, the rest are all men. Work with 7 bosses, there are just too awesome, there's once when I work late and he offer to send me back, reach right infront of my house! and then the next day, one of the bosses bring me and my colleage for a site visit, also bring us to try some nice food!....Just last Saturday, I've already planned to go back home, and the bus pick up point is really far from my work place(it took 1 1/2 hours), so they allow me to join them for another site visit, and after that send me to the bus terminal....very nice man uh!:D I never met bosses that always care for the staff. When the first time work in oversea, totally strange place, my boss give me all the informations I needed, such as what type of phone card I gotta buy to make cheaper phone call to home, what type of cab to take to go back hometown...drive me back instead of stopping at the nearby station like other people did...making sure I am safe returning home by asking the staff to send me home even tho' they can't manage to...:) I feel very glad to work under him. I like my work because of you. Thank you!

~We work for you not because we are afraid of you, but we respect you~

p.s.: this is actually the security guard from my university told me, he respect our ex-vice chancellor alot(Prof. Dato Dr Ismail Bin Hj. Bakar)